The Western Edition

Or … an excuse to talk about John Wayne

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I love Westerns. A lot.

This has become a huge joke among the people in my life. I don’t think that a girl who once had her whole face explode in an allergic reaction after getting too close to a horse is the typical audience for Western movies (I’m still not sure how true this story is but my parents swear it is true. The main point is that I have never ridden a horse, or really even been close to one.) I like medieval history, Greek and Roman Mythology, and pretty dresses.

My dad decided one day on a whim that he would show me Unforgiven, the dark 1992 Western starring an older Clint Eastwood and Morgan Freeman. It changed me.

Before Unforgiven my experience with Westerns was as follows:

1. The Mel Brooks classic Blazing Saddles.

2. That’s it.

We are not Western people in my household. My dad likes classic films, my mom loves action movies, and my sister only watches romantic comedies. I fall somewhere between my dad and mom. I love old movies, but put Die Hard on and it’s over.

But then: Along came Westerns.

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After Unforgiven, I was hooked, and I only wanted to watch more Westerns. The first one I wanted to see was The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly because duh, it was Clint Eastwood’s most famous movie (time for a super embarrassing confession - I still have not seen any old Clint Eastwood Westerns. I have yet to fulfill my dreams of watching The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. Future blog post?)

My father pushed back, stating that the quintessential Western to watch was Stagecoach.

I was a little hesitant, I’ll admit. Stagecoach was made in 1939, almost a century ago. I wanted something more modern. Something made after my parents were born at the very least! I wanted to watch a Clint Eastwood film.

Turns out I was wrong. Stagecoach is awesome!

And I discovered something else: I love John Wayne. I mean, I love, love, LOVE John Wayne.

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And now for a little segment I like to call:

Liz goes on a rant about her favorite John Wayne story!

Did you know that, allegedly, the Soviet Union put a hit out on John Wayne?

I think about this almost daily. Because that is CRAZY!

I stumbled across this incredible story while doing research for my college Cold War class. The class explored the Cold War through films (pretty cool class huh?). In a 2017 film, The Death of Stalin, Joseph Stalin offhandedly mentioned John Wayne. I was curious. John Wayne was famously anti-communist, and I wondered what the Soviet dictator was doing mentioning him.

And then I found this article asking the question:

“Did Joseph Stalin Really Send KGB Agents to Kill John Wayne?”

Have you ever seen a more bizarre sentence? I urge everyone to read this story because it is totally worth a read! However strange you think it is going to be, its stranger. This is all alleged, but John Wayne found out about this assassination attempt from his own stunt double. Instead of letting the FBI deal with it, John Wayne decided he was going to work with the FBI and handle it himself.

Orson Welles himself verified this story. Which is a whole other story in itself since Orson Welles famously hated John Wayne.

Isn’t this just the most incredible story you’ve ever heard? And it just kept getting stranger in the best possible way!

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And now back to our regularly scheduled program- Westerns.

I now happily tell people my favorite genre is Westerns. Nothing is better than an old-timey Western movie.

I have been informed by friends — including history majors with an unhealthy obsession with cowboys; you know who you are — that the Old West is, in fact, nothing like the movies.

My response to this: I simply don’t care.

Don’t misunderstand me, I do care about the historical context of this time period. The treatment of Native Americans was shameful.

But, there is something so alluring about the wild, wild west played out across the screen.

Western movies and shows consume my life. My favorite television show is Justified. There is an ongoing theory that the reason I love this show so much is because of Timothy Olyphant. I have no comment to make at this time regarding this theory. And I can be found re-watching Wynonna Earp.

I own three pairs of cowboy earrings and wear my cowboy boots so much that it has become a joke at school and at home.

So, you get the point (cue: panflute-ish sound “wa, wa, wa”): I just really love Westerns.

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So before I point you in the direction of the setting sun, I’ve ranked my five greatest Westerns of all time. I will also apologize in advance because some of these movies are a little more modern. I try to stick with Old Hollywood here, but some of these movies are so good that I couldn’t leave them off the list… I will argue that these movies pay homage to the classic westerns of the past and therefore should totally count.

Honorable mentions:

The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, 1962. This is such a good film, I have to mention it. The movie stars John Wayne and Jimmy Stewart. Any movie with Jimmy Stewart in it automatically wins points in my book. And this movie has one of the most iconic lines according to me: “When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.”

Blazing Saddles, 1974. An all-time Mel Brooks classic. This was the first ever Western film I saw and hence deserves a special place. My love for Mel Brooks knows no bounds. While my friends heroes were people like Miley Cyrus and Tom Brady, I always said Mel Brooks. This, of course, was very funny to my teachers, this little ten-year-old proudly proclaiming that she wanted to be like Mel Brooks while the rest of the class turned to each other to ask who exactly I was talking about.

Dishonorable mention: Tombstone, 1993. I couldn’t even finish this movie. Out of respect, since this is a popular film, I will leave my official comment as, “Didn’t like it.”

5. The Frisco Kid, 1979

Listen. It is a Western with Harrison Ford. For those unfamiliar, it follows Gene Wilder as a rabbi who travels West to his new synagogue, where he happens upon a bank robber with a heart of gold (played by a young Harrison Ford!). This movie is just pure fun. It’s silly and charming and, again, stars a young Harrison Ford. If that isn’t enough of a sell, well, did I mention that it stars a young Harrison Ford?

4. Stagecoach, 1939

This is the classic Western. It was John Wayne’s breakout role. The movie centers around a colorful cast of people traveling in a stagecoach who are trying to make it across the West without being attacked. This movie is ranked fourth because it might be a classic, but I can’t say it aged too well. There is no way to sugarcoat it: This movie is incredibly racist. There are many offensive and harmful stereotypes that drive the movie plot. So, this movie is on the list, but it is on thin ice.

3. True Grit, 1969

Here is the situation: True Grit was remade in 2010 by the Coen Brothers, and arguably the remake was better. HOWEVER, I’m going with the original, obviously, since it stars John Wayne. Though the 2010 version might be better, it has Matt Damon in it. And no Matt Damon movie WILL EVER be included on a top movie list here. That’s a promise.

True Grit is perfection. The story follows a young girl who convinces an aging U.S. Marshal to help hunt down her father’s killer. So many Westerns leave out women (unless they are women of “ill-repute”), so a movie that follows a young girl's journey through the West will always have a golden place in my heart and high spot on my movie lists.

2. Unforgiven, 1992

This is the movie that made me love Westerns. It is tragic and shocking (and funny) and INCREDIBLE. The movie is about an infamous hired killer who takes on one more job to help support his failing farm.

No spoilers, but the end scene is one of the greatest in history. Clint Eastwood might be older in this movie, but he is a BADASS! This movie is everything you want it to be. If there is one thing to take away from this post is that you need to watch this movie just for the final scene. Please.

1. High Noon, 1952

Ok, so I know that this movie is a little contradictory after saying how much I love John Wayne.

Quick history with Liz: John Wayne was strongly against this movie. Wayne was very vocal about his anti-communist belief, and played a major role in the Hollywood blacklist (don’t worry, there’s plenty more blacklist content coming). This movie was made in response to the blacklist, and John Wayne hated it. He supposedly called it “the most un-American thing I’ve ever seen.” Wayne doesn’t even consider this movie a western.

So why is this the greatest Western of all time (I am so sorry John Wayne)? Because it is about courage and standing up for what is right, even if no one else will, even if you know it will cost you everything. The movie follows Gary Cooper who plays a retiring marshal who is about to leave town with his new stunning bride when they hear bad news: A newly released outlaw with a grudge against Cooper is coming to town on the noon train. Everybody tells Gary Cooper to leave town, but the new marshal won’t arrive until tomorrow. No one else will do anything. . . what is Gary Cooper to do?

This is the first official This is Tinseltown must-watch!

If that isn’t enough of a sell, I saved the best fact for last. This is the movie that launched Grace Kelly’s career. While this wasn’t her first role, this is her first notable and major role.

So, now that I have convinced you, watch it and we can all agree that this is the best Western.

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On a more personal note, I just want to thank everyone who has subscribed, commented, and liked. I can’t tell you how much it means to me for you all to come along with me on this journey into Hollywood. I start school soon but I plan on having weekly posts, at least (though we will see what happens once I have six classes and play rehearsal to keep up with). Thank you again.